1 Corinthians 13:4-8 AMPC Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. (5) It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]. (6) It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. (7) Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. (8) Love never fails…
(Much of the content for this message comes from the book: Renner, Rick. Sparkling Gems From The Greek Vol. 1: 365 Greek Word Studies For Every Day Of The Year To Sharpen Your Understanding Of God’s Word, Harrison House Publishers)
In the English language, there is one primary word for love.
In the Greek language, there are four primary words for “love”:
Storge (Does not appear in the New Testament) – natural love that family members have for each other.
Eros (Does not appear in the New Testament) – Physical and sexual kind of love.
The word can have a negative or positive meaning. God designed it to occur in the context of marriage to attract and draw a husband and wife together. It is the passion that often motivates couples to marry. When it disappears, the couple thinks the relationship is in trouble.
Phileo – refers to friendship love, emotional love, or affection between two people. Note that the Greek word for friend is philos.
Agape – This is the highest kind of love that loves selflessly and sacrificially.
It refers to a choice or a decision of the heart to love someone. It is used to describe God’s love. His love is the highest form of love.
This word agape describes a love so completely different from what the world offers that it is only used in the New Testament to describe God’s love and the love that should flow from the hearts of believers.
Agape is a divine love that gives and gives and gives, even if it’s never responded to, thanked, or acknowledged. You could say that agape is a love that isn’t based on response but on a decision to keep on loving, regardless of a recipient’s response or lack of response.
Love endures long and is patient:
The two Greek words used here are compounded into one which pictures the patient restraint of anger and therefore longsuffering.
The word is like a candle that has a very long wick. Because its wick is long, it is prepared to burn for a long time. It is ready to forbear and patiently wait until a certain person finally comes around, makes progress, changes, or hears what you are trying to communicate or teach him.
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- Agape love doesn’t throw in the towel and quit.
In fact, the harder the fight and the longer the struggle, the more committed agape love becomes. Like a candle with an endless wick, it just keeps burning and burning and burning, for it never knows how to quit. This, of course, is contrary to human nature, which says, “I’m sick and tired of waiting and believing. If that person doesn’t come around pretty soon, I’m finished with this relationship.”
Love is kind:
The word “kind” in the Greek means to be adaptable or compliant to the needs of others.
When agape is working in your life, you don’t demand that others be like you. Instead, agape makes you want to bend over backwards to become what others need you to be for them!
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- Agape love has a willingness to serve and to change to meet the needs of others.
This is the complete opposite of selfishness and self-centeredness. So, when Paul writes that love is “kind,” an expanded interpretation of this phrase would mean:
“…Love doesn’t demand others to be like itself; rather, it is so focused on the needs of others that it bends over backwards to become what others need it to be.…”
If this is what Paul means when he says that love is kind, we must look into the mirror and ask ourselves: Do I become what others need me to be, or do I demand that others be like me?
The person walking in agape love adapts to those around him in order to touch them, help them, and impact them in a meaningful way.
Love is never envious nor boils over with jealousy:
The word “envy” is a Greek word which portrays a person who is radically consumed with his own desires and plans. This is a person so bent on getting his own way that he is willing to sacrifice anything or anyone to get it.
You might describe this person as being ambitious and self-centered. He is so consumed with himself that he doesn’t ever think of the needs or desires of others. His own plans are paramount in his mind, and everyone else come after him.
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- Agape love doesn’t think of itself first but is always looking outward, thinking of the other person rather than itself.
So, examine your relationships at home, at church, and at work, and ask yourself: Am I committed to seeing others blessed and successful, or am I more committed to my own cause than anyone else’s?
- If you’re walking in agape love, your greatest concern is that others succeed!
Love is not boastful or vainglorious or display itself haughtily:
Paul says love is not boastful. This word comes from a Greek word which means a lot of self-talk. In other words, it describes a person who endlessly promotes himself and exaggerates his own virtues.
His self-promotion is so outrageous that he is usually prone to exaggeration that borders on lying. One Greek scholar has said that the word pictures a person who is full of hot air. Another expositor has said this word refers to a windbag!
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- Agape love doesn’t go around talking about itself all the time, trying to make it look more important in the sight of others.
Often people exaggerate and boast endlessly because they have a hidden agenda they want to promote or because they want to gain some higher position or place of authority. Other times they are hoping to make the kind of impression that might give them special status or recognition in the eyes of others. Finally, they may just feel driven to prove their worth. Regardless of the reason that people boast about themselves, this kind of behavior does not demonstrate the way that agape love behaves!
Agape love is so strong, so sure, and so confident that it doesn’t need to speak of itself or its accomplishments, even if those accomplishments are greater than anyone else’s.
Real agape love would never flaunt itself in this way; instead, agape love wants to focus on the accomplishments of others in order to build them up and make them feel more valuable and secure. Remember, agape isn’t a self-focused love — it is focused on giving of itself in order to meet other people’s needs.
Love is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride):
Paul gives the fifth characteristic of agape love when he tells us that love “…not puffed up.” These words are based on a Greek word which means to be proud, to be swollen, or to be inflated. Thus, this word vividly paints the picture of a person who is filled with pride
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- Agape love is never deceived into thinking too highly of itself, nor does it arrogantly claim that it is better than others.
Making this word even more significant is the fact that the word phusio also carries the notion of a person who has an air of superiority and haughtiness or a person who is snooty or snobbish in his dealings with other people.
Love is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly:
The Greek word for “unmannerly” suggests a person who is tactless or thoughtless. It also expresses the notion of a person who is careless and inconsiderate of others. Both his actions and words tend to be rude and discourteous, and he exhibits bad manners in the way he deals with people. His language is harsh and brutal, revealing that this person is uncaring, insensitive, and unkind. In short, we would say that this is a person who “acts ugly.”
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- Agape love is not rude and discourteous — it is not careless or thoughtless, nor does it act in a fashion that would be considered insensitive to others.
So how do you fare when you look into the mirror of God’s Word today? Did you pass the love test, or have you come up short again? If you see that you have fallen short of the high-level love God wants you to possess and exhibit in your life, it’s time for you to go back to the Lord and talk to Him about it again! Never stop going to Him until you know that you are walking continually in the high-level love, He wants you to demonstrate in your life!